The Prayers I Pray Everyday

Legos….  I don’t know how big a part of your life these little blocks are.  I don’t know if you have fond memories of building things with them or of watching your kids play.  Maybe not.  Maybe you hate them.  Maybe you step on them in the middle of the night and wonder how such a small piece of plastic can bring so much pain.  Maybe you have ruined a vacuum or two because of them.  Maybe you have searched for the right “(microscopic) gun for this guy” or “(microscopic) hair for this girl” too many times to appreciate the magic of Legos any more.  If you are not in the height of Lego world right now let me tell you, they have come a long way.  Now they all come in sets to build specific ships, towns, buildings, or vehicles.  There are also approximately 2,043 Lego shows on Netflix, 5 million YouTube videos, and a movie for goodness sakes.  I know Legos.

For my 10-year-old guy it is all Legos all the time.  I think for Christmas and his January birthday he received every Star Wars Force Awakens Lego set.  These $100 boxes are filled with 20 plus bags filled with thousands of tiny pieces that all come together to make a Millennium Falcon or At At Walker.  (I know Star Wars too.)  And this kid blows me away every single time.  He won’t start a set until he knows he has ample time to finish the whole thing.  For example, he saved the Falcon for Spring Break.  He sits down on his floor, door closed, and for hours he goes through every page in the instruction manual, every tiny piece, step by step until he emerges with the whole ship.  This amazes me because he cannot seem to pass a math test and yet…. Anyway, his room is completely filled with these precious masterpieces.  In fact, when we moved to the Ranchito the room we chose for him was the one with all the built-in shelves for this very reason.  (Books?  Who needs books?)   So, my 10 year old son has a 5-year-old brother that has no idea he is 5.  He wants to watch, do, play, be all the same things his brother watches, does, plays, and is.  This, of course, includes Legos.  So little brother has received some very paired down versions of big brother’s sets.  (But NOT DUPLO!!! Don’t be trying to pull any of those BABY LEGOS on him!!!!)    Here is the problem.  He is in fact 5 years old.  He does a pretty good job with the Legos but he cannot do what his brother can.  His little hands just can’t quite work the same.  So inevitably about 10 times a day he becomes frustrated with a piece he can’t get on, or one that keeps falling off, or the ship that has fallen and broken and comes to me crying.  I send him straight to Big Brother because there is no way I know what is supposed to go where.  Nope, Big Brother is the master builder in our house.

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What does all this have to do with my prayer life?  Well, the other morning as I tip-toed (okay, maybe stumbled a little) out to my quiet prayer spot in the pre-dawn fog, I found my mind and heart a little foggy too.  I couldn’t quite finish a thought all the way through.  I felt like there were so many things that needed prayer and the Father’s attention.  The kids’ tests today, her attitude, my friend’s marriage, my husband’s job, and all the activities tonight…. Jesus, please.  Anxiously my heart raced beneath it all.  And then I had this little vision.  I pictured myself hauling a big box of thousand of Lego pieces boldly into the throne room of my Heavenly Father (Hebrews 4:13).  In the silence of my living room I could almost hear the unmistakable crash of the box being emptied (you know the one, Moms) in front of God.  I saw myself pouring out all the pieces of my anxious heart… My husband, each one of my 4 children, their worries and concerns, my tribe, their families, my community, my dreams, even the soccer and baseball practices, ballet rehearsal, and T-ball game that were charted for today…. There I sat, in the middle of the pieces.  It looked like a big fragmented mess to me.  I didn’t know how to make sense of it.  I had lost the instruction manual.  I didn’t even know what all those pieces were suppose to build in the end.   But here is the thing, I was presenting them to the Master Builder.  He not only had the instruction manual, he wrote it.  He not only knew what to do with the pieces, He created them.

Prayer is my passion.  I am serious about prayer.  I have journals and notebooks and strategies.  I fight hard in prayer.  But sometimes I just can’t find my way and all I have is a big mess of pieces.  I have found three scriptures that I pray EVERY SINGLE DAY help ground me no matter where I am.   Maybe they will help you too as you drag your mess before the Master Builder.

“Teach us (me)  to number our (my) days (today) aright, that we (I) may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalms 90:12.  Yes, Lord.  Teach me to number this day aright.  Show me what is important to get done and what is not.  Show me where I am most needed and where I can let it go.  Calm my anxious heart and replace it with a heart of wisdom as I look at this to do list, as I field these responsibilities, as I steward these children, as I seek to please You and bear fruit for Your kingdom.  Jesus, just show me how to get the tacos on the table before we have to leave for the game.  Show me how to be in two places at once.  Number my steps, my priorities, my words, my prayers correctly today so that when I lay my head down tonight I may have gained a bit more wisdom in this frazzled heart.

Equip me today as “God’s workmanship created in Christ Jesus to do good works (today), which God prepared in advance for us (me) to do (today).”  Ephesians 2:10.  Jesus, I never want to lose sight of the fact that we walk this faith out for real, on the real ground, in the middle of our real days, with the real people you have put in our lives.  I know that you have created me and though I am not saved BY my good works but by Your grace, I have been saved FOR good works that you have planned for me to do.  I acknowledge that you not only have a plan for my life and my legacy, but you have a plan for my day- today!  Equip me to accomplish those good works.  Illuminate those good works for me today.  Show me the person who needs a simple smile, create the space I need for listening to my children, give me the words I need for the hurting friend.  Make me ever mindful that I am your workmanship, your handiwork, your masterpiece.  Help me protect my witness when I am frustrated, or anxious, or sad, or hurried.  I know that my life is simply made up of all my todays so show me those good works and equip me in them- TODAY.

“If your Presence doesn’t go with us (me) don’t send us (me) up from here. ”  Exodus 33:15.  Lord, if I am trying to head in a direction today, be it in my head, my heart, my car, my conversations that your Presence is not, stop me.   If my desires for myself, my family, my tribe do not match your best for them, for me, make it clear.  I only want to be on the road with you.  Lead me.  Show up.  Give me the wisdom to turn off all the distractions and listen for Your still, small voice saying, “this is the way, walk in it.” (Isaiah 30:12).  Because in the end, tonight as I turn off the last light and clear the Aussies off the bed to find a spot, it wont matter what I have gotten done or checked off my to do list if your Presence has not been with me the whole way.  Humble me and quiet me every step along the way so that I remember YOU are my very great reward (Genesis 15:1).

These are the pieces that I dump before The Lord each morning.  These are the prayers I check back in with as the rollercoaster of my day starts it’s climb and then rushes down.  Teach me to number this day aright, equip me for Your good works today, only let me venture where Your Presence is leading.  I am like my littlest…. My hands can’t quite work all of the pieces.  I don’t know where it is all supposed to fit.  I don’t always have the big picture of what my day, my walk, my family, my life is supposed to turn out like in the end.  But God is so much more that a big brother that is a little bit farther down the line.  He is THE Master Builder.  He has manual and the picture and the patience to get down in the mess with us.  Allow Him to take that first piece and then find the next one and the next and watch what He can build with our fragments.    So, dump all of your pieces out before Him.  Don’t be afraid of the crash or the mess.  He isn’t.   He has a great plan not only for your life, but for today.  Give it to the Master Builder and let Him do His thing.

Find Your Tribe, Love Them Hard

Proskartereo.  I think it is my favorite word in the Bible.  I love it so much that I painted a sign with this Greek treasure on it and hung it above our bed.  Proskatereo.  Here is Strong’s Concordance’s definition:

  1. to adhere to one, be his adherent, to be devoted or constant to one
  2. to be steadfastly attentive unto, to give unremitting care to a thing
  3. to continue all the time in a place
  4. to persevere and not to faint
  5. to show one’s self courageous for
  6. to be in constant readiness for one, wait on constantly
Basically- DEVOTED.  When my pastor preached on Acts 2, where we see a beautiful picture of Proskatereo, he gave this meaning: to continue to do something with intense effort with possible implications of and despite difficulty.  Proskatereo.  Devoted.  I mean I want to have a pep rally for this little verb!  Our best example of this devotion in action in the Bible is in Acts 2:42-47:  “They devoted (proskatereo) themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.  Everyone was filled with awe and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles.  All the believers were together and had everything in common.  Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need.  Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts.  They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people.  And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.”
All of this Proskartereo begs the question: WHAT AM I DEVOTED TO?  If I am totally honest and transparent I would have to say that I am pretty devoted to my phone.  It is rarely out of hand much less out of sight.  I glance at it countless times an hour.  I depend on it for communication, entertainment, information, weather, time, music, etc.  We are devoted to one another.  I would also have to confess that I have been devoted to certain shows for years.  They will remain nameless but lets just say we have been through a lot together… post-it note weddings, plane crashes, the death of a McDreamy husband, (“you are my person”).  Don’t judge. Also let me say to Coach Taylor, “clear eyes, full hearts can’t lose.”  And don’t even get me started on the Bravermans. All my love forever. I am also devoted to carbs.  Even when others have left them in the name of Atkins, or gluten free fads, or let’s say the ability to fit into their jeans, I have remained steadfast in my devotion to all things bread.  I have continued with intense effort and much expense in my devotion to staying a blonde.  Let’s be real.
But, I am also devoted to my husband.  That is why Proskartereo will always be above our marriage bed.  We have pressed on towards obedience and each other when it has been difficult.  Even if we haven’t always looked past or overcome our differences, we have steadfastly chosen each other above them. Devoted.  I am devoted to my children and in this season a huge part of my life means being devoted to educational choices that certainly could cause one to faint if they were not persevering.  If you looked at my schedule you would see that evidently I am devoted to a t-ball team by the name of the River Dogs, a baseball team that go by the Reds, a soccer team called The Heroes, and a spring production of the ballet “A Mid-Summer’s Night Dream.”  I am devoted remaining close to my family even though several states separate us.  It takes intention and attention (and a million rapid rewards points)  to cultivate relationships that span generations, especially long distance.  Proskartereo.
What was the Acts 2 Church devoted to?  We read that they were devoted to the apostle’s teaching, to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread (carbs are biblical!!!), and to prayer.  Basically, they were devoted to God and to each other.  Devotion.  It’s  a serious thing.  We have to work to make the things we say we are devoted to match the things our schedule, bank accounts, and conversations show we are devoted to.  I am always astounded when people tell me that they don’t have time to study the Word of God, read a book, or cultivate a meaningful prayer life, but if you look at hours in a day they seem to be devoted to twitter, or a workout schedule, or a sports team. They were also devoted to each other; to living life on life, sharing meals, meeting needs, bearing burdens, lifting prayers. TOGETHER.
 Your tribe.  Your peeps.  Your girls. Your community.  Your friends. I am loving this little mantra right now:
FIND YOUR TRIBE.  LOVE THEM HARD.
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Yes.  This.  A thousand times this.  I really love that Jesus had a “tribe.”  They were called disciples.  Even though He was sent to save all of humanity, He had His tribe.  He had a close group of guys that He did life with, traveled with, broke bread with, spent His days and nights with.  Jesus loved His tribe of 12 hard.  He loved them hard when they were hard to love.  He loved them when they were ignorant, He loved them when they went off the rails (hello Peter cutting off an ear), He loved them when they failed Him (like napping in the garden while He was praying blood), He loved them when they didn’t understand or believe Him, He loved them when they ran and denied Him.  He loved His tribe hard.  Even within His tribe of 12, Jesus had a closer tribe of 3.   Matthew 17:1 says, “After six days, Jesus took with Him Peter, James, and John the brother of James, and led them up on a high mountain by themselves.”  These three were the inner circle in the tribe.  Jesus, the author of community and relationships, one-third of the trinity, was DEVOTED to this rag-tag, grungy, incredibly flawed tribe of fishermen, tax-collectors, and sinners.  He got away with them.
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He knew that though He knew every hair on all the heads that would ever walk the earth, while walking on the planet He needed His tribe.  He gathered them and was unapologetically devoted to them until He returned to heaven.  Proskartereo.
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Maybe in this culture of inclusion yet independence, we fear wholly devoting ourselves to one tribe.  We may have our feet in so many groups that we forget which one we belong to, or worse, we never belong to any.  We have continual access to newfeeds and perfectly filtered pictures of what all 500 of our “friends” are doing all of the time and who they are with… This has produced the relatively new disorder called FOMO. Fear Of Missing Out.  If we truly devote ourselves to one tribe, won’t we miss out on what all the other tribes are doing? The answer is yes.    But if we are not careful we will end up with friendships a mile wide and an inch deep.  Those are called acquaintances.  That is not your tribe.  I’m not talking the people you host baby showers with, or have perfectly planned dinner parties for (although I am a huge advocate of both).  If you have to get cleaned up before they come over, or apply lipstick, or tell your children to behave, they are not your tribe.  I’ll go a step further and say if they have not seen you cry, watched you fight with your husband, witnessed you yell at your kids, or seen you in a bathing suit, they are not your tribe.    If they don’t know your kids’ middle names and don’t have permission to spank them, they are not your tribe.  Proskartereo.
How do you “find your tribe”?  I know that it is certainly not as simple as a cute saying.  I have found that the journey to a real tribe is both organic and intentional.  It cannot be forced.  There is not sign-up sheet for real community.  You may have to step into several circles before you find the one that works for you. You may get hurt, or left out, or stretched.  But in the process, you must be intentional.  If you only ever present your shiny self you will not find a real tribe.  Tribes take time to really form.  Tribes take sacrifice… a sacrifice of schedule, of agenda, of service, of sleep.  Tribes take devotion.  Once you have found your tribe, love them hard.  Love them hard when they are hard to love, when they go off the rails, when they get funky, when they become needy, when their kids are hard to have around. Pursue them when they go radio silent, when they get depressed, when they are sick, when they are sad.  Love them when your paths look different, when your marriages look different, when your days look different, when your bank accounts look different.  Be devoted to your tribe because they will in turn love you when you are hard to love, or when you need to go to the ER in the middle of the night, or your feelings are hurt, or your marriage takes 2 steps back.  Never underestimate the power of a tribe.
I have found my tribe of women and I love them hard.  They love me hard right back.  We are devoted to meeting together every Wednesday night to hang out, pray for each other, talk about Jesus, and grow in our knowledge and faith.  We are devoted to doing this in our PJ’s.  We are devoted to doing real even when it is messy and demanding and inconvenient.  We are devoted to helping raise each other’s kids.  (We may also be devoted to arranged marriages. Whatever.)  We are devoted to speaking the truth in love and calling each other to the best versions of ourselves.  We are devoted to weeping together and celebrating together and supporting each other’s dreams and families.  We are really just devoted to together.  I have my 12, I have my 6, I have my 3.  I will be unapologetically devoted to this tribe just as Jesus was unapologetically devoted to His. So here is a shout out to my tribe, past and present.  I love you. I need you.  I couldn’t do it without you.  Thanks for all the Proskartereo.
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What about you?  I would love to hear about your tribe and how you love each other hard.  Comment below or on my Facebook page “A Word That Matters” and let’s discuss devotion to your tribe. Give your own tribe a shout out right here…. tag them, let me see pictures and hear stories; a little virtual pep rally for Proskartereo.  Let’s encourage each other on our journey!  #findyourtribelovethemhard

Cleaning Out the Closets of Our Faith

So my big project over spring break was to clean out all the kids’ closets and drawers.  I know, PARRTAAY, right?!?! Oh how “Spring Break” can transform in a couple of decades… Anyway, I literally touched every little sock, pair of undies, and discarded shoe of all four of my children.  These were tedious hours.  Not-so-nice emotions surfaced when I realized someone had lost one pricey church shoe, or a brand new dress was shoved in the recesses of the PJ drawer, or so on and so on.  Also, there was a bit of embarrassement and “mom guilt” when I recognized that all of my 10 year old’s shorts were size 6-7 and everyone’s toes were scrunched inside of their school shoes.  The time had certainly come!  So, armed with garbage bags for Good Will and a list of what everyone was going to need for the approaching warmer weather (and a little T Swift on the Beats Pill), we tackled it room by room.

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In hindsight I should have taken on this task alone rather than including the kids but I needed them to try things on (which they loved let me tell you) to see what fit and what didn’t.  The problem came when certain t-shirts, or nightgowns, or flip flops which they were very attached to proved to be too small.  Then, the panic and agony when they realized they were going to be passed down either to younger siblings or to friends was ridiculous!!!  I calmly stated that we were not going to keep things that were too small, no longer needed, or useless.  I also reminded them that if all their bathing suits or shorts were too small then they could in fact get new bathing suits or shorts that would not show their bootys, for example.  We also made a “keepsake” pile for each- things that they could no longer wear but wanted to save…. all my daughter’s Nutcracker T-shirts from every performance she has been in, all my son’s camp T-shirts, anything with a tiger on it for my tiger-obsessed 6 year old… You get the picture.  It seemed fine until that evening when little sister walked out of her room in a pair of PJ’s that just this morning had resided in big sister’s drawer…. And we were back to the agony.

All of this cathartic (all be it dramatic) cleaning out brought me to a place of contemplating some things in my faith as I took my cozy place on the couch next to my Bible the next morning and eyed bags of grown-out-of clothes and shoes.  Here is where the Word of God took me, “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.  When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.”                          1 Corinthians 13:11.  I put childish ways behind me.  It sounds like the apostle Paul is calling for a little cleaning out of closets himself.  In Hebrews 5:11-14 we read, “We have much to say about this, but it is hard to explain because you are slow to learn.  In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again.  You need milk, not solid food!  Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness.  But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good form evil.”  Do you hear the author (probably Paul again)’s annoyance?  I can hear echo’s of my own voice saying, “Your rear end is hanging out of those shorts!  They are too small!  Let’s get some that fit.”

Are there areas in your faith where you are squeezing into some ill-fitting spaces?  Are you hanging on to some comfortable routines when God is calling you to pass them on?  Are you still trying to fit into some old revelations when Jesus has a brand new one for you?  Does your prayer life look like a bottle filled with milk while The Lord is waiting for you at a banquet table?   Maybe it is your very best Sunday dress… the miracle you still stand on.    Is it time to perhaps put it in the keepsake pile and go get another one?  I’m not saying forget it! No, we will remember and tell our children of all His deeds.  But don’t we trust that He has something more for us?  Is there a place of leadership or influence that you need to hand down to someone a little younger than you in Christ?  They cannot step up until you step out.  Are you still just trying to scrape out a few moments a day to read a warm and fuzzy devo after years of walking with The Lord while He is calling you to teach?  Are you stomping around in the same ‘ole sin when He is calling you to righteousness?

We have a good Father.  He will not leave us with our toes scrunched.  And he will not let us go bare-footed if we put away childish things.  It is hard to let go and move on in our faith.  It may hurt to see someone else stepping into what once was yours.  We like to feel as though we have mastered certain areas, worn the grooves just right.  But here is the thing, we can never get to the end of our God.  Isaiah 43:19 says, “See, I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?”  Perhaps we cannot perceive it because our head is stuck in a faith that is too small.  Just like I was willing to take my four growing children to the shoe store the next day and get everyone footwear that fit, He will be kind and gracious as He leads you to your new thing.

I don’t know where you are on your walk of faith today.  Maybe waking up 15 minuets early to pray for your family is your new thing.  Maybe putting away childish sins like gossip, sexual immorality, impure language, etc. is your new thing.  Maybe a warm and fuzzy “Jesus thought” devo is all your young tummy can hold right now.  But if it is, it won’t be for long. Perhaps He is asking you to step out and make a phone call, teach a Bible Study, be real with a group, start writing a something for goodness sakes (ok, that was for me).  He is calling all of us to maturity. He is calling all of us to a bold, grown-up faith.  He is calling us to the meaty things of righteousness.  He is calling us to a broken world that needs the PEACE and JOY that only He can bring and He will use us to BRING IT! We better take off the flip-flops that our toes are hanging off of and get our boots on!  And look back there, a little way down the road… Do you see that sister that is ready for some new digs?  The ones that you have grown out of may be the perfect fit for her in her new thing!

The Word of God is alive and active (Heb. 4:12).  Where things are alive, they are growing.  Where we grow, we grow out of.  Our faith is a RELATIONSHIP not a KEEPSAKE.  Won’t you take an inventory of your walk today and see if there are a few items, a few areas, a few callings, even a few sins that are too small for your BIG God.  We can trust that He has a new thing for us and will make sure we are dressed for the occasion!